As an Emotional Intelligence Coach, I provide single, black, MOMS who are in the "prime time" of their lives with the necessary tools to adjust and accept the change of being an "EMPTY NESTER". You are not alone in being unprepared or "caught off guard," by this new season/transition of your life. Many of you threw yourselves into the role of being a “mom” to focus on your babies and unconsciously put on the back burner the hopes, dreams, and desires you once had for yourself.
The emotional havoc that you are confronted with when it’s time to face the “empty” in the “empty nester phrase” is what perplexes you the most and leads you sometimes barreling down a rabbit hole of loneliness, sadness, guilt, and confusion when dealing with the reality of “now what?”
I want to help you to refocus on the beauty of the fact that you have put in decades of hard selfless work. Whether you planned your pregnancies, were a teen mother (like me), or became a parent in an untraditional way, you did it! You raised your once little people who've blossomed into now full-grown adults. Can I let you in on a little secret? You too have grown and evolved. You are NOT the same person you were before becoming a mother. Let me help you to get intimately re-acquainted with the woman you’ve become and help you to find out how to fill that void and know exactly what your "NOW WHAT" is.
We will start by doing a thorough Self-Examination (or what I like to call getting butt naked in the mirror) which will explore where you are, where you want to go, and what it will take to get you there.
I will then be your supporter who will help give you practical & principled tools you can use to hold yourself accountable.
I will help you understand that you and only you are responsible for how you act no matter how you feel. It's a must that you know how to manage your emotions when transitioning through this empty nest season so that you can stay on the side of being emotionally intelligent vs. being emotionally ignorant. EI/EQ is a valuable resource to add to this new season of life. It will aid you in making difficult decisions without losing it, help you to resolve conflict, not take everything personally, adapt to changes, and keep you level-headed while navigating this transition to mid-life which does not have to be a crisis.
We will also point out the areas where you need to be selfish (giving yourself self-love and creating healthy boundaries) because you can't practice Self-Lessness if you're giving from an empty tank. For years we poured our everything into being a parent and put ourselves on the back burner but now it's time to put yourself upfront.
This is the time to move past the mistakes you've made and understand that there are no perfect parents. You're a person who went through the same cycle as the child/children you just raised. It's imperative to make peace a number one priority and forgive yourself for your past missteps. You can't make anyone love you or see the changes in you if you don't do it first. Self-Love is your responsibility, not someone else.
You are more than a mama. When you find out what you were created for you have a reason to LIVE your life. People forget that our purposes can change as we grow. Knowing your purpose for this new season of your life and walking in it helps lead to a fulfillment that many have yet to experience.
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